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Fighting Camera Fright (Stage Fright) When Speaking Publicly Online or Offline With Communication Expert Dr. Bill Lampton Ph.D
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https://mikestewart.live episode #3 talking about better communication in business and online with communication expert Dr. Bill Lampton Ph.D
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More info on Bill at http://bizcommunicationguy.com
Good morning, everybody. It’s Mike Stewart with Mike Stewart dot live. So glad you’re here. Hopefully people are getting in their seats on Facebook and YouTube and more importantly at the website, Mike Stewart dot live. I’m excited about the show today I want to tell you a little bit about who I’ve got as a guest, Dr. Bill Lampton, one of my dear friends met him at the Georgia speaker Association, probably over, Oh, geez, probably 25 years ago or more. Okay, Bill may know the better date. That’s how my memory is going these days. But, you know, when I started building websites back in the 90s, I was focusing on making audio and video work on websites. I had a company called sound pages, I used to make webpages with sound. And that’s how bill I went up to build it the speaker’s Association, and I said, Do you have a website? He says, Yes, I do. I have a website. I said, but does your website have sound because you know, if you’re a speaker, if you’re a professional keynote speaker, or coach or trainer, and your website, nobody can hear you, that kinda is a disconnect. For me, um, you know, people should be able to hear you. He says you can you can be heard on your website. That’s it. Absolutely. I specialize in making websites with audio and video. Now this is 1996 97, somewhere in there.
That’s when I started Soundpages.com, I got out of my studio business and started doing audio and video web pages. And so, with all that being said, Bill became a customer. And then of course, more importantly, he became a local neighbor. I lived in Gainesville, Georgia, he lives in Gainesville, Georgia to this day, and we just became very endeared to one another. I mean, he’s just one of those special people. He’s so brilliant. I’m not gonna tell you his age, but he, he’s much younger than his real age. That’s all I’ll tell you. He’s a whole lot younger than that. He’s, he’s willing and open to learn things that maybe were did come natural to him. They were not part of his generation. Um, you know, I mean, he made a comment to me that when he was a professor at a university, he delegated things that now he has to embrace himself, you know, you know, email didn’t exist back in those days, webpages, the internet, there’s so many things that didn’t exist back in those days.
And nowadays they do exist. So one of the things I love about Dr. Bill Lampton is that he has just always had an open mind and I cannot believe this many years later, he still works with me every month, just wanting to learn more, and and that’s a lesson for us all. So his expertise, his communication, his expertise, is, you know, dealing with speaking, and you know, he actually is an expert when it comes to stage fright. Now, I want to tell a couple little stories and I’m gonna bring bill on but the stories were, you know, when I started building web pages using video, I never forgot I had this client, who was a genius when it came to computers. I mean, he owned a computer repair before You could ask him a question about a Windows computer I mean he knew the answer and I’ll never forget I said well let’s let’s get all this information on your website in a video and I said So tell me about you know windows and and what you do and viruses and installing software and hardware.
You know all this techno stuff and he’s like, going a mile a minute, just passionately and confident. And I held up a camera , you know, this is the camera we use today a cell phone back then it was a Kodak Z, if I recall. he froze. He I mean, he just went from expert to solidly frozen and could not we never got a video. We got nothing, because he was so scared of this device. So You know, they say that that death and public speaking are some of the biggest fears in the world, which I can understand being scared of dying. But public speaking Well, you know what video is you know what this webcam right here is. This is public speaking to an inanimate piece of plastic. And it’s amazing how if you want to do online video, it is the speaking world and you have not stage fright. You have camera fright. Well, I had to learn how to get over that. I remember back in 2002, my good friend Armand Morin, let me speak on his stage on audio and video marketing. It was the Big Seminar in San Francisco I think was 2004 or 2005 somewhere in there. And I’ll tell you, if you can see here in my studio here I got guitars and pianos because I’ve been a musician I have played in front of as many as 10,000 people one time I did a show years ago, and I was as comfortable as I could be behind those keyboards and behind the curtain But the thought of getting up on that stage and standing out center stage with nothing but a microphone or lapel microphone and looking at all those people and having to speak I was petrified. I mean, I started getting nervous just thinking about it. So you know what I did and this is this is just shows you have dominance and people who may remember that time I was at the big seminar. I came out with my guitar and I sing a Beatle song you can see here in the back, there’s pictures of the Beatles. I’m a huge fan of The Beatles. So I set a new lyrics to Yellow Submarine. “We all live in an audio world” singing Yellow Submarine with audio lyrics. everybody laughed. Everybody thought it was cute. I sat down my guitar. And I got through the speech. And in fact, I actually one speaker of the seminar, you know, and I had never done it before. Been in front of 100 or 1000 audiences playing music, but speaking I had stage fright. I was scared. to death, and when I turned it into my subconscious thinking that I was playing music. I just felt like I was talking for a long time to a music audience. So anyway, those are my stories. But here’s why it’s really important for you to listen to bill today. He is an expert at communication. He is an expert at stage fright. And so I’m without any more me rambling here. I want to bring on my good friend and communication expert, Bill Lampton.
Bill, are you there?
Good morning, Mike. I’m here and I refer to you as the guy who got me away from the number two pencil. Well, let’s see here. Here you go. They still make them there they are. There’s a number two pencil right there. But you’ve made an unnecessary for me and you were right on the year it was 1997. When you asked me if I had a website, and I thought I had a website until I started looking at other people’s websites and man did I give you a call quickly We’ve worked together, as you’ve said, ever since, well, you know, you you’re just one of those people who, who, you thirst for knowledge, and you’re brilliant. And, you know, I used to say people don’t know what they don’t know, it’s not a matter of education. It’s just that you got to pick and choose the things you want to know. Well, here’s what I think our folks want to know, in the probably asked us some questions. I’m actually seeing some comments coming in here, but we’ll save them to the end. Talk about stage fright and how it applies to online video and just just, I’m a dummy here, I want to make better online videos, I want to make better YouTube videos, I want to communicate better to a webcam or shooting videos with a cell phone. Give me your best, you know, I get a thrill out the goods here. I’m gonna go away. And the floor is your and if if I have a question, or I see some things we need to know. We’ll come back with that. Go for it. Well, thanks very much, Mike. I very much agree with the fact that what we’re saying applies to a lot more than when You’re just standing up before an audience because we got stage fright under a number of circumstances. A lot of us these days are going to be interviewing for jobs. That can be a mentally threatening experience. You have to conduct a meeting with your staff either online or if your company’s meeting in person. You have to do that. There.
You’re going to make a sales presentation that is on nerving as well. So making a video as Mike says, anytime that you’re making any kind of presentation online are before a live audience. That’s present stage fright control is important. And the major first point I want to make Mike is that I’m not saying stage fright cure. I’m saying stage fright control Why? Because stage fright control stage right at a certain level when we control It has advantages. And I’ll use an example I’ve used a lot of times. I counted one day I’ve been a University of Georgia football fan ever since I taught there on the faculty and speech communication accounted recently I’ve been to about 250 home games. And the illustration I like to make is suppose I go to a home game, and I see the team run out and come to their midfield. And suppose they all go and sit down on the bench and start yelling. Well, that’s bad. They’ve got no stage fright, they’re just saying ho hum to the situation. So you want to keep that edge. I never want to go into any kind of presentation, including this one. When I’m not maybe pacing the floor ahead of time. It’s good to be on edge control it. Okay, what are some of the steps in controlling it and Mike You can chime in anytime you’d like to. But one of the first ones I would give is that those symptoms that you and I and everybody else feels about stage fright. And I could name a dozen of them my hands are shaking, our hands are sweaty. We feel like we can’t get our words out where person perspiring from our brow, which is a problem. If you wear glasses, our knees are shaking, our stomach is churning.
Or Guess what? Nobody is aware of those physical symptoms, but us. So recognize that what we are feeling is not even visible. It’s not even audible. And the worst thing that we could do is to say to our audience, you know, I’m really scared but I’m sure you’ll put up with and what if your surgeon says you know, I’m really scared bill, but I’ve got this knife here and I think I know what to do with it, but you’ll excuse me if my hand shaking a little bit. So, first two points, then control your stage fright. Don’t try to get rid of it. Ignore all those online who say they’re going to get rid of it for you. And secondly, remember that the symptoms themselves are visible only to you. What would you add at this point, Mike and I certainly have some more points. Well, you know, we’re gonna get I’m seeing some good questions coming in. And I invite everybody to keep going to either YouTube or Facebook, especially Mike Stewart dot live, you’ll see a chat box there and I’ll be able to see those questions. Uh, you know, I mean, the thing is, is any tips you can give us, like one of the things that I was taught, I don’t know if you ever heard this bill. But you know, when you I had a friend years ago who say that when you’re talking to the camera, you know, you’ve got to make sure that you look at the lens, say like, if I look like this over to the side when I’m shooting video. That’s, I can’t I’m not making a connection with the viewer. So eye contact is important eye contact. So at I’m sure that’s true with with with interviews or, or live speaking, you know, in other words, you need to use eye contact as best you can. But when it comes to shooting videos, if you struggle with shooting videos, I was told years ago, hold a picture of your father, if you’re talking about something mechanical or technical, and how I put that picture, you know, it’s not where you’re not looking at the camera but but like you’re talking to your dad about, well, dad, let me explain to you how this phone works. You tap here, but if you’re talking about something emotional if you’re talking about something serious or something that has not so much a technical than show a picture of your mother and tell your mother and explain it to her and, and just practicing that in the mirror, and just getting used to presenting and, and being enthused, you know, that’s that’s one of the things that I used to do with video but what are what are some other things that you know, are little, little helpful tips that could help people communicate better, especially when it comes to the YouTube, the online LinkedIn, the places that you can put online video, what would you recommend?
I would say to your remember that your ideas about the audience probably need to be changed. We think that our audiences, whoever they are, whether it’s a video audience or an audience right there before us, we think they’re going to be so critical. They’re going to be so judgmental. But think of the times that you’re sitting in the audience, unless the speaker is somebody did you hold a grudge against you do not want that speaker to fail. It’s very uncomfortable for the audience when a speaker fails, and we’ve all seen that happen. That’s just as uncomfortable as it is for the speaker. So think about the fact that your audience instead of being your critic, your audience Is your cheerleader. And really what I like to tell people is, Mike, you’ve spoken very large audiences. And I’ve had the privilege of doing that too. And when I was speaking to an audience, I remember in Richmond, Virginia of 600 people, I remember that there was one common thought most of them had. And that thought was, you know, I’m glad it’s bill up there speaking and not me. audiences are sympathetic. They want you to succeed. And let’s go to some other situations. The person that you’re trying to sell something to when you’re making a sales presentation, that person wants you to succeed because they’d love it. If your service or your product works for them. The person that you’re interviewing with for a job, they’re not going to be condemning you right away. They would love it. If you solve their problem. Boom, there’s search, and you’re the one who is right for the position that they’re offering.
And Mike, you mentioned video. One of the best suggestions that are that I heard was from Scott willeford. from Atlanta, Scott owns a video company and what he advises people when they say, Gosh, I’m just afraid to do video. Scott says, Get over yourself. There’s, there’s some value in that recognize. And this is another point I like to make. There are three things that you can think about when you stand up to give a presentation or you sit down across the table from somebody, your audience, your message, or yourself. It’s great if you focus on the audience, because you are trying to meet their needs. You’re trying to connect with them and as Mike said, in a very conversational way. It’s wonderful if you concentrate on your message. This is what you’re passionate about. And you want to persuade them that this is significant in their life and in their profession. But the third choice, if you focus on yourself, you’re set up for failure. For example, you’re focusing on yourself, you’re wondering, gee, what impression Am I making, and you’re looking at here and somebody’s texting, and somebody else is nodding off and somebody else gets up and leaves the room and suddenly, all your self confidence is out the window. So change your view of audiences recognize that they are with you, they support you, and recognize too that focusing on the audience or the message is far more valuable and productive and spirit boosting for everybody. Then focusing on yourself.
I think that’s all great information, Bill. I mean, you know, you are the expert. I gotta, I gotta share one other little quick speaker story with you. And then we’re going to get a word from our sponsor. And then I want you to tell us everybody in the next segment about your book. But look at this thing here. I don’t know if you know what that is. You can’t see it in the podcast. But this is a clicker that was invented back before World War Two. And they used to give these things so that they could communicate, you know, during the war. And I had a speaker, you might know, I’m Chuck Reed, you remember Chuck? Yes. And I remember you giving me those speakers to do some recordings with those clickers. Well, we discovered a thing for digital editing with these clickers. But what I used to love is that Chuck had a problem saying too much. So he created a bunch of these clickers. And he gave them to everybody in the audience. And he says, anytime I say I want you to click it and of course After doing that a few times he never had to pass them out again because the minute he got up it was like people were listening but you know what it did it forced people to listen to him intently. Hopefully they were absorbing the information but I thought that was a fun speaker story.
So anyway, I’m going to be right back after this word from our sponsor, which happens to be my passion these days going live I it’s a mantra say, go live. Re-purpose and archive. We’ll be right back in 60 seconds. Well, thanks we’re back hope I hope that you consider you know in fact I’m living what I preach there in that ad I’m go live. I re-purpose and I archive and basically that I was told by a mentor bill years ago, that that when you want to be found more and more on the internet, which is called traffic, that content marketing and paid advertising is pretty much all there is left. You know, a lot of the SEO people in the world don’t like to hear that. Search Engine. optimization is, it’s not gone, but it’s not. It’s probably about 50% of what it was 10 years ago, and Seth Godin said, All that’s left is content marketing, if you want to be found for free, and you and I could across the years have seen so many things that were the thing for two to three to five years, and now nobody knows what they are. They’ve been. The one thing that’s constant is it will change that is the one constant.
Well, tell us about your book. Okay, I wrote this book, because I recognized that there were many people I could not get to in person, but I wanted them to have my 25 ways to control your stage fright, and become a highly confident speaker. This is a very brief book, I’ll tell you ahead of time, it’s only 24 pages. Don’t go far length, go for quality and and here I have the 25 best tips that I’ve learned I’ve used and I’ve taught since 1997, when I became a professional communication consultant. So this book is available on Amazon. It’s available in Kindle version or in this brief paperback version. And I can, I believe, guarantee that you will get tips in this book that you have not thought about before. And that will be very valuable in helping you control your stage fright. And my one of the tip I’d give now, which also is one of those included in the book, one of the mistakes we think we make about stage fright is thinking, Well, you know, I’ve just got to be perfect. I can’t make any mistakes. I can’t, I can’t goof up on some words. I can’t forget anything. I’ll be a terrible failure if I did. And one of the things I do when I’m coaching clients about speaking. I give them a list of tips. And when I come to the tip, don’t try to be perfect. I purposely misspelled the Word Perfect. I mean, I really butcher it, but they can still tell what it was. And our mistakes are okay. For example, if you run into somebody, a friend in the grocery store and you start chatting, and all of a sudden you have to restart, are you you have a word that doesn’t come out, right. Do you go home and beat yourself up about that? No. And those of you who watched Johnny Carson during his heyday on The Tonight Show will remember that Johnny Carson, you almost wondered if he planned his mistakes because he can make so much Adam Johnny Carson would say something that was was obviously mistaken and hit, tap the microphone and maybe do a little soft shooting. ants, which I don’t know how to do, but get over your mistakes. People don’t want a robot up there. And if you put the emphasis on the wrong syllable instead of emphasis on the wrong syllable, that’s okay. That’s great. Well, we got a few questions here. I swear. I’ve been doing these live shows here for about six weeks now. And I do it with my partner in pest control. So I’ve done about eight shows bill, and I’ll tell you what, there’s so much fun, and they go by so fast. I can’t believe we’re almost coming up to the close here. But we do have one question here from Tom Brooks, good customer friend of mine, great voiceover guy out out in Oregon says great see you Bill.
How do you use LinkedIn for communication? You got any suggestions for Tom on that? The main thing I do on LinkedIn is to try to post regularly try to post meaningful, helpful material, not much in the way of hard sell mostly information that people can use. And Tom, it is good to hear from you. You and I are connected on LinkedIn. And you’ve noticed, Tom that I not only publish my own material, including videos quite regularly, but I will post quality material from other people as well. The main thing I don’t do on LinkedIn is the minute somebody connects with me, try to pitch them, just tell them something I like to say on LinkedIn. If you connect and you pitch me you strike out all that that’s great advice, Bill. I’m just looking to see if any, folks this is your chance. We’ve had a couple of good questions here. We’re getting a lot of you know getting a lot of good comments. My good friend Karlin Bunting, he mentioned it. Here’s my good friend, a Canadian buddy in real estate Michael Creason. So I’m getting all kinds of good fact you know, Michael said I was interested in getting his multimedia career off. So so you know, we’ve been consulting and communicating with People for years and years, but like I said, one of the one of the things I love about going live here and having live people, it does two things bill, it makes you It holds you accountable. You know, in other words, I am I this is one of my old jokes. You know, it’s like, I’m gonna do that someday when I get around to it, you know, I said, I’m gonna start a podcast. You know, I know how to podcast, I know how to do YouTube, I know all these things. I teach all these things. And I’m gonna get to it when these days when I get around to it. Well, this is what I have. I have around to it. Hey, we all need that.
Yeah. And and so, you know, I think I think Dan Kennedy said, or somebody may, I don’t know maybe somebody else said that 99% or 95% of success is showing up. So that’s why I’m so thankful you showed up for this show. Is there any closing statements you want to say before we close the show out but this has been great information, the message I have is learn what holds you back and get over yourself. Just make yourself do it. Anything else that you could say about making better video because basically making video is speaking that’s what it is. And you have been a communication speaker coach for years and years and years with lots of success under your belt, folks go to biz communication guy.com check out bill join his email list. Look at his playlist, watch his YouTube channel. Get to know this man he is um, he’s just a gym that that more people need to know is out there doing things because you know what he doesn’t have to he’s doing it because he loves it. He loves helping people and hopefully that comes across from both those. So anything you want to say? And then we’re going to close this show out. The final two points. One is we’ve we haven’t mentioned preparation of course. I like to say preparation reduces your perspiration. So you do have to prepare but don’t over prepare. And then because you can get tired of it. And then the second thing I would say, and I think this is extremely important, and especially with video, forget that word delivery. We’ve been teaching it for so many years and talking about how to give a speech, leave delivery to FedEx, the post office, and other services. Think instead of having a conversation with your audience speak to them as though there were one person there, even if they’re thousands are if they’re an unknown number on the internet. Just speak to that individual in the audience with a conversation. They’ll love it. Alright, bill that that is great advice, folks. Share this website Mike store dot live. That’s where I archive the show. It’s in YouTube, subscribe to my YouTube channel, subscribe to my email list. Subscribe to my podcast in other words, there’s more multiple opportunities to get all this information.
My goal is to bring some of the stellar people of the world that can share insights, the things that maybe you need to know more about, maybe you struggle with. And that’s why I wanted to have my good friend Bill Lampton here say, So Bill, thank you so much. If you want to go live, the show is brought to you by dot live secrets calm. That’s where you learn to go live. Repurpose, and archive. You know, I suspect anybody who sells something they don’t do themselves. Very suspect of that. But I believe in this so much. That’s why I do the show. And I appreciate all of you people who make carve out a half an hour of your morning to spend it with me.
So share this with everybody. share it on social media, get to know Bill Lampton. And thanks so much, Bill. We’ll see you shortly. I promise.
Thanks, Mike. It’s great privilege to be with you and your viewers and listeners. I, thank you, my friend. Have a great day.